televisions' life support

Thursday, June 29

t.o.w. the star spangled banner

US National Flag : The Star Spangled Banner - Mary Young Pickersgill

US National Anthem : Star Spangled Banner - Francis Scott key

O say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watch'd, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof thro' the night that our flag was still there.
O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore dimly seen thro' the mists of the deep,
Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
In full glory reflected, now shines on the stream:
'Tis the star-spangled banner: O, long may it wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion,
A home and a country should leave us no more?
Their blood has wash'd out their foul footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave:
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O thus be it ever when free-men shall stand
Between their lov'd home and the war's desolation;
Blest with vict'ry and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land
Praise the Pow'r that hath made and preserv'd us a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto: “In God is our trust!”
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

-----

The American Dream...

Ahh. I still question what I did. And now wonder if I'm fit to live the American dream after all.

You are almost always lesser than the person you think you are.

Anyway. In lieu of the (happy) conclusion of the recent block tests and the arrival of this most befitting 1 week holiday, I have embarked on a journey to learn more about the American national anthem and flag! Did you know that there are 2 more verses to the star spangled banner but that they are hardly sang at all because of possible innuendos/euphemisms about British culture. And did you know that the original ameriacn flag only had 13 stars?

Of course you don't and neither are you interested. This is why I'm the only freak waving my star spangled banner to the US soccer team.

Other things I need to do during this short reprive,

1. Watch OC
2. Buy OC
3. Buy clothes
4. Bowl
5. Eat good / junk food

Please don't wake me up from my week long reverie.

kenn thwacked an asshat munchkin' at 4:55 PM

Sunday, June 18

t.o.w. the wake up letter

Dear Kenneth,

Please stop it.

At the rate you are going, you are headed for destruction. Actually at the rate you are going, you might just finish the J1 BT1 topics in time to get good grades.

Please stop coming online and doing silly things like playing hexic and minesweeper.
Please stop taking 2 hour breaks after 15 minute studying sessions.
Please stop telling yourself everything will turn out ok like they used to.
PLEASE STOP CHEATING YOURSELF.

Time to hit the books for 11 days.

And then you can enjoy 7 free days and the right to brag about your fantastic results.

WE ARE NOT GOING TO SPEND THE 7 DAYS MULLING OVER WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN.

SO STEP UP AND DO IT YOU LAZY ASSHOLE.

I'll get you the nice topman shirt if you don't let up this 7 days.

And of course the elusive american dream.

Good Boy.

Regards,
Your better alter ego.

kenn thwacked an asshat munchkin' at 10:31 PM

Friday, June 16

t.o.w. all the emo

I was blog sprawling a while ago and damn arent people in the emo brood mood around here.

Must be the very wet gloomy grey weather. Anyway, its spurred me to do a little writing myself ; just to stimulate the brain in other ways not studying and well to practice writing.

Because I want to do well for GP. Taking that a side, I have to do well for GP and all the other subjects. Not neccessarily because I want to but because I need to in order to get what I want.

Sometimes I think I'm shallow because even though I think the world about the life that I want, I bet its a brow-raiser if people are to hear of it. It really is stupid. Inambitious. But yet, in order to get there, I'm gonna have to work my ass off.

Since the foreboding of this entry seems like a 10-things-bad-about-me kinda issue, I guess I'd just go along. I hate that I'm so private. That I don't live it up and show the world who I really am. Bree's right baby, pretences rule the world. But damn are they tiring. I don't know if thats why I like my alone time so much because thats really truly the only time when I think I'm true to who I am. The whole damn bloody world just judges too much and even though I guess the onus is on us to rise above that and accept us for ourselves, I'm just not capable. Oh how I admire Andre from Runway 2. He'd actually wear a green singlet and yellow pt shorts and walk down Broadway and Times Square in New York. Heck it, I don't care if you score 20 million As or if you run a 30 second mile, you are nothing unless you accept yourself for the real person you are. And thats why for now and the very near future, I will be nothing, because I cannot stand the way the world judges. Ok maybe the way Singapore judges. I judge. I judge more than anyone I know. Maybe thats why I'm tentative. Anyway. I just read Ronald's entry about friends and stuff like that and I'm real sorry to all my close friends, but the real truth is I haven't been 100% real with you at all. Well at least if you think I'm ditzy and mad, you're a step closer. But I think I ask that from people, but I know its impossible. I'm just fucking afraid of what is going to happen if I leave this nice protected cove.

And talking about Ronald's entry. Damn is he right. I think sometimes we arent content and once we acquire something, we then look forward and ask for more. So how are relationships and partners going to figure this out if what they have isnt real? And then again, how the heck do you know whats real. You can tell yourself that its something you've never experienced before or something new and absolutely different but then you never really know what real is and maybe if real is good enough.

This is depressing.

So is my studying. But at least the kenneth-hotbod plan is back on track.

I think I think I think too highly of myself. In many ways, I haven't been the person that I've set out to be. Sure, I think I could do whatever needs to be done and impress, but the root of the matter is that I'm ultimately doing it with wrong reason.

Just like what I'm doing with my life this year.

And I don't know if it could be considered a sacrifice at all but hey, at least I know what I want.

A lot of things in my life I knew I wanted but for a while I was going about getting them the wrong way. Even though I was sure I was right, I still turned out wrong. So now I'm lost.

Peyton is right. 6,470,818,671 souls in this world and only 1 matters.

Yourself. If you don't get who you are and if you don't accept who you are. Then the other 6,470,818,670 people are just but mocking.

Because they think they know and they think that they have it and so they mock and judge and criticise. How you dress, how you think, how you walk, how you smile, how you talk, how you live your OWN life. But they actually don't. No one is truly sure about who they are.

You just see yourself the way you want to be seen.

Maybe thats just best.

----

Damn! The last portion of this entry is totally OTH-fitting. I can imagine peyton doing the voice over.

I Like.

kenn thwacked an asshat munchkin' at 8:40 PM

Monday, June 12

t.o.w. the clay court classic

Dang, I only caught like the last 2 points of the match.

Good enough to see Nadal lift his 2nd grand slam and definitely more than enough to see Losey Poosey Federer pucker up at his loss.

Hai. I always hate the way top players dominate the game. They make it boring.

I'm quite sure I'll start to like Federer soon. *smirks

kenn thwacked an asshat munchkin' at 9:47 PM

Friday, June 9

t.o.w. striking out

Thanks for the blues-lifting mondays, midweek emotional fodder wednesdays, let your hair down fridays and those lovely casual saturdays.

Damn it, 1.5 years is way too short.

Somehow I didnt think I would join a cca without any friends prior but I came into this banging head against wall, subconciously overcoming certain personal barriers I put up and now I leave it with great aquaintances and 14 amazing solid friends.

Thanks guys for making this 1.5 years so memorable and enjoyable. It was a definitely a great run. All the team renzha days, up to cheering out hearts out for the seniors during nationals 05 and then surviving the days of training without funds or a proper coach, photohunting, still training together in the holidays, our 1356 routine in term 2, training with the juniors, this time around bowling our hearts out in nationals 06 and all that coupled with the crab luncheons, ddr frenzies, summer blockbusters that we've caught together, chalets, mahjong - yes of course mahjong and laughing. If I'm to take anything away from all that, it had to be laughing. I think its more than safe to say that we transcend team spirit. Its hard to put in words and describe it to people, especially those who arent in it because I guess it just reaches out to people in different ways. And I'm glad we're more than a team because I'm proud of us. I'm not trying to make a statement of how tight we are by saying that we're the closest any team can get cos' thats just nonsense. You cant possibly know what others are going through when you don't go through the exact same thing and even then, people feel differently about the same things. But I know one thing is certain, I'm proud and glad to be a part of this family.

I guess the entire period-drawing would be a lot more enjoyable if I had bowled a lot better during nationals. Of course I think I deluded myself into thinking I was masters quality with the sudden hikes I had in my performance (especially with that 190 avg day). But I guess I improved from age group and I think I can most definitely say that the process was a whole lot fun too. From start to end, I thoroughly enjoyed the spirit of competition and even before that, training was fun all the way. Haha, and just for shameless bragging rights, at least I can say within hwachong, I won all 3 events - singles, doubles, quartet and also hwachong high game - 209! Haha. I wished I could have done better, bowled maybe a 10 pin higher average and maybe broke my pb for a bit but I guess after all that is said and done, given what I had and the horrible bout of food poisoning during nats, I guess I'm at peace with how I bowled and never will I look back at it and think about what could've been if this or that might have happened.

But anyway! Shoutouts for everyone whom have made this journey unforgettable. In no order of merit of course.

Shaojie! Captain to the team! Thanks for trying your best to lead us out of the very dark times we've had in our term. Also, thanks for being a great singles and doubles partner and for TINGing me everytime I was down. Hope I did the same! Anyway, thanks for being the person to always motivate me to improve and for teaching me my way around the lanes. Half the bowler that I am is all you! Thanks!

Janice! Lonely buddy! Haha. Thanks for being lonely together through these 1.5 years. You've been a great friend all this while and no matters what happens after this, we were friends, great friends at that and even if faith decreed it to be indeed one moment in time, I'd still be content knowing that we had some great times together. Hopefully we'll be lunching at Four Seasons, New York some time soon too!

Zhiyong! Ah yong! Haha. Hands down one of the reasons why I always enjoy my training sessions. Frankenstien always entertains and amuses me with his reactions on the lanes and his diva head twirl at the mahjong table and all the other funny stuff he says. Also thanks for the countless cab rides and for ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS smiling. Haha. We will strike, we will spare, we will win, KICKSOMEASS. =D

Kegan! Banana! Kee! K2! Haha. Always entertaining and amusing ourselves with the juuccey song whenever we can. Thanks for always being the friendly familiar bowler face at the class bench. And once again, I DONT DISCREDIT YOUR COMMITTMENT, I ASK WITH GREAT CONCERN. =D Wee!

Yanchen! Thanks for being another great familiar face around the left wing. It seriously calms me down knowing we are all trying to get past to the next training date. Its been a whole lot of fun bowling with you because you are always positive. And even when you arent doing well, you find a way to get past that and motivate others. Great respect for that. Also! Thanks for being part of the well-dressed bowlers list. We are lacking in numbers.

Youxin! If anyone was a familiar face, you'd be it. Thanks for all the lifts home and the discount OCC games. Haha. Also thanks for just being a great person to hang out with and for always keeping the energy up with your laughter. Keep the bowling tradition strong in 74! Go 74!

Joy! Thomson! Haha. Please don't move away to new ton one. I need more rides! Haha, thanks for all the entertaining conversations you have with your mum on the rides home especially the one with the petrol scarcity problem. Seriously, that trip had so much laughter in it I briefly considered if I would ever find anything funny again.

Well of course there is! We are family! I got my brothers and sisters with me! Yingcheng! I will always always remember the classic snapple line and just about everything else that you've said thats made me laugh over and over again just thinking about it alone. Thanks for being immensely supportive during nationals and I hope you have a great bowling term too! However, most of the fun that we've had was off the lanes and once again, thanks for being the entertainment muse for everyone. You are indispensible in my opinion. Rock on xiao di! Also, thanks for populating the well-dressed list! We are going to get the belts. =D

Wilson! Haha. Thanks for always smiling and being the bundle of joy that you always are. You and yingcheng seriously make a great pair. You seem to magically feed off each other. Match made in heaven. Please do cherish him. Haha. Now that you are captain, please step up and bring hwachong bowling to greater heights! Keep bowling well and bring the team together! Thanks for all the great times we've had in and out of bowling. =)

Sheena! Vappy! Lackey! Haha. Where do I begin. Thanks for being my bowling rock this 1.5 years. Through the renzha days, OBK - the experience of a lifetime, 1256 training routines, crystal jade meals, reading room sessions and a whole a lot of cabs later, I think we've made friends for life. And hopefully what we have transcends bowling and translates into fulfilling our american dream! Star spangled banner! I guess I really need to thank you for always being there whenever I was down and for always amusing me with your silly antics. I don't know whats going to happen now with the bowling closure but I definitely will see you in new york roommate. We're going to "friends" it up on our own!

More thanks to everyone! Good or bad, I guess its part of the experience you've given me. So thanks (again) to andrew, timmo, julian, nelson, yusin, shouheng, yongjun, hongming, weishan, nicole, melissa, shaojie, zhiyong, janice, sheena, yanchen, nicole, joy, yanchen, brian, yiling, youxin, aikling, michelle, valerie, kityeng, yuting, yuherng, yaoguang, wilson, yingcheng, zhaolong, sean, jonathan, weimin, ruizhou, guozhen, gary, jezrel, zhirui, cheehao, paul, yeow, miss tay, davids, pashmina and of course kalai's mum =)

Even though it was up and down, it was mostly up.
Even though there was laughter and anger, it was mostly laughter.
Even though there was fun and sorrow, it was mostly fun.
Even though there were times of doubt, you were always a constant.
And so even though its bye for now, it can never be the end,
No period

Thanks for a great run hwachong bowling!

Damn, arent we closed and huddled!

kenn thwacked an asshat munchkin' at 8:39 PM

Tuesday, June 6

t.o.w. gaming closure

Today is a blog worthy day.

one - o - freaking - seven baby.
hell yeah!

Close to 15 hours, strained eyes, lost time and permanently crooked fingers.

Now baby, this is closure.

kenn thwacked an asshat munchkin' at 10:21 PM